You may think Mom Jeans Making Scenes is just silliness and crazy-intense swagger, and that's mostly true. But there's something darker, much more sinister to Mom Jeans that you may not be aware of.
Interest piqued? Great. Keep reading, betch.
So if you'll refer back to my previous post, "Becoming a (Paid) Social Media Influencer," it took me a while to bring MJMS to the public. It was a time of self-reflection, of identification, of discovering passion. And maybe I was also scared shitless, but whatever. Different story.
... So in the meantime, I posted cute pics and talked to others about my goals. *hair flip*
When I told other friends I met online that I wanted to start a fashion blog, I got a surprisingly common response - "Wow, I wish I had a good sense of style. I wish I could do that. I like fashion, but I'm not very fashionable." My aspiration was met with a lot of self-doubt and embarrassment in others, and I didn't expect that.
Why do we do that to ourselves?
On paper, I am the last person qualified to be a fashion blogger.
- I was (and still am) a huge nerd, even back when nerd was definitely not cool or even socially acceptable mm'kay? Like hissing in a dark corner hovered over my Pokemon cards, painfully nerdy child.
- I am not the most beautiful person or the most fashionable. There are always HASHTAG GOALS that I see and wish I could be so effortlessly stylish and cool, but that's not me.
- I don't have the cash to buy all designer. (HELLOOO, MOM OF FOUR!)
- I am short AF. (Side note: Disney aptly calls my 5'5" stature the "dead height zone" - too tall to play a small character, too short to be a princess. FML.)
- My body is not all that and a bag of potato chips, dating all the way back to 2009 (AKA pre-stretch marks and children).
- I am very aware of my shortcomings. I have plenty of self-doubt of my own. You and I? Not so different. (Unless you are way cooler than me, and if so teach me your ways!)
So I started thinking about it. If "fashion blogger" had a requirements checklist, let's just surmise what it would look like:
[ ] Some type of education in fashion or design
[ ] Ability to create new, captivating styles
[ ] Experience in the fashion industry
[ ] Articulate
[ ] Naturally stylish
[ ] Popular - someone people want to model themselves after
[ ] Tall, skinny, and flawlessly beautiful
If this were a job posting, would anyone be fully qualified? ... Bueller? Bueller?
And that's when I realized. The beauty and fashion industries have been intentionally exclusive for a very long time. It's all about continuing to reach for the impossible, to buy more products to fill the void of not feeling good enough. Do people currently in the fashion industry even feel that they are enough?
Ever since I was about twelve, I loved fashion. Did fashion ever love me? Ehh, don't know. Who's to say? (That's a s/o to my sister who says that, and yes I'm reading that in your put-on accent, Kiki.) It felt like art. It was a way to express my creativity and individuality without saying a word. This was great for a taciturn introvert like me to feel authentic. No one had to even notice. I didn't care about the attention. It was something that I did for myself to make me feel happy.
Did I make questionable choices? Abso-fucking-lutely. I had an ADORABLE(?) near-mullet in middle school that haunts me to this day.
Do I still make questionable choices? You bet, buckaroo. But here's the thing:
YOU DESERVE TO DO WHATEVER MAKES YOU HAPPY. THERE SHOULD EXIST NO BARRIERS TO PURSUING WHAT YOU LOVE.
Like art, fashion is also subjective... So who cares if you get weird looks when you go out and you -know- you look fly as hell? They clearly have a different ideal for aesthetic, and that's okay. Or maybe what you perceive to be judgment is really someone else projecting their insecurities on you and wishing they had the confidence to wear what you wear.
The beauty of our world is in our differences, and that's exactly why you should pursue whatever it is that makes you feel like YOU. No one else has your voice. No one else can express themselves the way that you do. You are a fucking butterfly. Don't let the world snuff out your light by pushing their negative vibes on you.
A deaf composer? Into it.
A mediocre family of celebrities? Someone seems to think so.
An Otaku Miss America? Why the hell not?
A middle-aged, mom-joking nerd who loves expressing herself with fashion? You rang?
Instead of telling yourself not me, ask yourself why not me? What's stopping you from pursuing your own happiness? Is it that you think you're not enough? Maybe those qualities that you perceive to be holding you back are actually what make you stand out from the rest. Ever thought about that?
You can do amazing, life-changing, norm-shattering things. You just have to first accept yourself as you are and start going after whatever you're passionate about. I swear to God, if I have to see another @Haileeyyyyyyyyyyy on IG that looks like all the other ones and takes the same shots using the exact same poses, I will have a conniption.
Mom Jeans Making Scenes, to me, is an outlet. I created the Mom Jeans persona to show the world that you don't need to be perfect to put yourself out there. You're good 'nuff as you are, cream puff.
I want our tribe to spread the idea that you are exactly the way you were intended to be.
I want us to support one another in our desires.
I want us to rid the world of the notion of scarcity when it comes to success.
You are a uniquely-made piece of fucking art with selflessness that is counted in the silvery stretch marks on your body, history written in the flecks of color in your eye, and a lifetime of love, compassion, and laughter engraved on your brow. You are a complex being, and that's exactly what you were intended to be. Embrace every part of yourself, and never be ashamed to follow your dreams.
cute little heart,
Is there something you want to pursue but have reservations to get started? Share your stories in the comments below!